


One Day it will be Okay Again

by TotalFanFreak



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: 12x13, Alzheimer's Disease, F/M, Gen, Implied Relationships, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Reader-Insert, Reader-Interactive, Spencer - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-16
Updated: 2017-02-16
Packaged: 2018-09-24 22:58:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9790895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TotalFanFreak/pseuds/TotalFanFreak
Summary: [This is my take to the reader’s reaction as Spencer’s S.O. in the events of 12x13.]





	

_**“We are all the pieces of what we remember. We hold in ourselves the hopes and fears of those who love us. As long as there is love and memory, there is no true loss.”** _   
_**― Cassandra Clare** _

You were nervous, sadly, you were always nervous around Spencer’s mom. The first time was because you didn’t know how she would react to you dating her only son, that you wouldn’t be good enough for him. But in some bizarre fate you passed that test. Now you were afraid of how she would react just to seeing you. She had been losing her recognition of the one person she treasured in this world, losing periods of time, losing herself, and you knew there were going to be times she would have no idea who you were. But having moved in a few months prior you didn’t really have anywhere else to go, though you had offered looking for another place. Spencer’s eyes had widened, that deer in headlights look that always crumbled you. He wanted you there, not to help with his mom, but to ease him. He wanted someone to fall into, and he wanted it to be you. Leaning for moral support and handing over complete trust like that, how could you say no?

 

Mrs. Reid was having a good day today, which was a relief with Spencer still gone; she had been flipping through the scrapbook Spencer had sent for while you began lunch. You glanced at the clock and you knew Mrs. Campbell would be here soon.

“Would you like some tea before lunch, Mrs. Reid?”

The woman looked up at you and blinked over her glasses. For that second you feared her brain had gone blank before she smiled.

“I told you to call me Diana dear, Mrs. Reid was a different lifetime altogether.”

You smiled back. “I’m sorry. Would you like some tea though, Diana, I thought it’d be nice to have some before lunch. And I always enjoy sipping something warm while reading.”

“Tea would be lovely, as long as it’s not that putrid green kind.”

You laughed, no, Spencer hated it as well. Saying it was something akin to dried weeds soaked in a urinal. But he had been drinking a lot of tea, coffee dwindling, as he heard some teas would help improve memory. Something to do with hindering enzymes, long words that you would never be able to pronounce but awed you spilling from Spencer’s lips.

“Black tea all around then.”

Making the tea, you slipped one of the little vials Spencer showed you before his trip. You had seen them before and scared he was using some kind of drug approached him about it.

“It’s a holistic compound, I-I have been talking to a doctor in Texas, she says it should help slow the process of the brain deterioration.”

So it had been left to you, fearing Mrs. Campbell wouldn’t take to the idea of an unlicensed medication. Letting two of the little droplets sink into the tea, you added the lemon juice and agave that you knew she liked, clinking your glasses together she smiled before her concentration went back to the book. You had no idea what it would feel like, wanting to keep the scraps of yourself together, clutching in the dark for something you weren’t sure of. You let her continue, hoping she could keep in place what she was trying to hold. Spencer had put in a whole new diet for his mom, slowly adopting it himself. He was timid at first wondering if you would dislike the new foods, only making you snort in laughter telling him you had been wanting him to try them for a while.

Since olive oil had been put on the list of brain foods you thought you’d make some flatbread with a nice pesto. The nuts in it would give an extra boost of omega-threes, prepping the dough you tried to figure out what kind of protein to put on it. You knew that woman was tired of fish; honestly you were surprised she hadn’t grown gills yet from how many meals rotated around fish.

“Do you need any help?”

Startled, you jumped at the voice. “Oh, no, that’s all right Diana.”

She looked at the dough in your hands before her gaze went back to you. “Are you sure? I’m actually pretty good at it, at one time in my life I aspired to being a French pastry chef.”

Your hands ceased movement, a brow raised in curiosity. “Really?”

She chuckled. “Yes. I was still an undergrad, and we had begun delving into classic French plays – some being of Molière. Well, let’s say I was smitten with the humor and culture.”

“You thought about moving to France?”

At this point Diana had washed her hands, drying them enough to coat them in flour as you cut the ball of dough in half and gave it to her. You watched, transfixed, as her hands expertly kneaded the dough enough to begin flattening.

“Absolutely, the slow paced lifestyle, the landscapes and history, not to mention the food; I wanted nothing more than to walk along the Rhine, sipping a coffee as I watched young artists flourish.”

You wondered how Spencer would be if he had grown up in another country. You almost giggled at the thought of his curls being covered by a beret, a pencil mustache that he’d twiddle as he talked about existentialism. But then again, perhaps his youth would have been better, you weren’t sure but the calm demeanor there, maybe the children would have regarded his mind better.

“It sounds wonderful.”

Diana smiled wistfully, shaping the dough down. “It would’ve been, but I don’t regret my life. After all I wouldn’t have my baby boy if I had left. Do you ever wish to travel?”

You shrugged a shoulder. “I’ve always wanted to see Italy.”

She gave an ardent smile. “Oh, to be in the land of Dante Alighieri and Villani, but then again though I am sure the cuisine is outstanding the Italian wouldn’t have religieuse.”

“What are those?”

“Oh, honey, they are the best pastry dessert you could have.”

It had been a nice lunch, more than nice being given insight in Diana’s life. Though you knew her mind, like her son’s, far outreached yours in contemplation you were both very similar. Having wanting the same goals at your age. After cleaning up, she had went to take a rest as Mrs. Campbell arrived, and you were about to catch up on the laundry and read the paper when your cell buzzed on one of the end tables. Seeing it was Penelope you put on your best secretary voice.

“Hello, this is Y/N. How may I help you?”

But the chirpy voice you were used to, wasn’t there, instead it was very desolate. “Y/N…It’s about Spencer.”

Oh, God, you knew it, he was a day late, and he was never late. He always called if the plane was delayed, hell, he called anyway and you hadn’t heard from him since yesterday afternoon. “What happened? Is he okay? What’s wrong?”

“Calm down, sweetie, I know you’re scared – he’s, well he’s in jail.”

“What! Why is he in jail?”

“He was picked up in Mexico, apparently the car he was in had drugs in it. The police think he might be a drug mule.”

“That’s insane, Spencer Reid would have to be on drugs to be around drugs. They have the wrong guy; did they even look at his papers? They got to know who he is. Spencer’s in Houston so I don’t get how –“

“That’s the thing, a lot of it really, he didn’t have the proper credentials on him, he had a personal passport instead of his work one, which they found in the car he supposedly stole –“

“Are you kidding me?”

This was ridiculous, it was a fucking farce really, Spencer Reid stealing cars, distributing drugs, it was insane.

“No, jellybean, I’m not, they’re doing blood work right now, but from the mugshots I have…he looks high as a kite, Y/N.”

There was no humor in her voice, and you knew she felt as numb as you. “Mrs. Campbell’s here, I’m on my way down there.”

“There’s nothing you can do honey, Emily, Rossi, and Alvez are on their way down there to him as we speak.”

“I don’t care! I can wait with them, they have to let me see him.”

“I’m afraid they won’t let you honey.”

Your chest was shrinking and you felt tears clog your throat. “He’ll at least know I’m there. You said he’s high, someone slipped it to him, and he’s probably scared and cold, probably out of his mind with worry. I can’t let him be alone, Penelope.”

“Come down here, you can sit with us and I’ll keep you updated, Spencer is getting help and he’ll be back home before you know it. But I don’t want you to be alone right now.”

You covered your mouth so the muffled sobs wouldn’t echo, you could not let Diana hear you. You could not shatter her and let her think something was wrong.

“Y/N?”

“I’m sorry, I – what the hell’s happened? I don’t understand, he said he was going to Houston to get more medicine for his mom, I don’t get how or freakin’ why he was in Mexico.”

“Medicine?”

You caught the perked interest in her voice. “Yeah.”

“Honey, come down here, it’ll be good to tell us about that, it could help with the case, and just, please, don’t be alone right now, I know with Mrs. Reid –“

“No, I understand, I don’t want her to see me like this either. She’s sleeping right now, so I’ll slip out. Thank you, Penelope.”

“You’re family, you don’t have to thank me. Not until we get our baby genius back.”

You walked out of the elevator into the surprisingly empty bullpen, and without realizing headed to Spencer’s desk. You looked at the picture he had of you, it was of you sleeping, and though you saw it as unattractive, he stated it was one of his favorites. Seeing you so calm and the small smile as you slept, it brought him comfort.

“Hey, Y/N.”

Turning you saw JJ, her eyes probably as red as your own. You jumped from the desk and pelted yourself in her arms feeling her squeeze you tight.

“It’s going to be okay.”

You were about to lose it again as tears glazed your eyes over. “I know. It has to be. It’s just unreal. This isn’t Spencer. Something happened down in Houston, someone’s dong this to him.”

“We’re doing everything we can, the team touched down a few minutes ago. But right now, let’s talk, we’ll get something to drink and you can tell me about this medicine Garcia mentioned.”

There wasn’t much to tell, Spencer had shown you the weird vials after hearing his socks clank together when you put away his laundry. He said it was an organic compound of different herbs though he wasn’t too sure what was all in it. Something, you added, was uncharacteristic of him. But he was so hopeful it would help his mom that maybe it didn’t matter. You told JJ about the doctor, going to the laptop in the meeting room and pulling up her article. JJ hugged you again calling Emily about the woman.

Though it was hours, it felt like minutes when you were told the doctor had been found stabbed – and that the Mexican police were pinning it on Spencer. Spencer Reid a murderer? It was the most ludicrous thought imaginable. Spencer couldn’t even kill the mouse that had invaded his apartment, instead having to cage it and driving half an hour out of the city to release it in the woods. You had wanted to mention so bad that it was probably owl food by now.

Maybe this was how Diana felt, trying to pull the memories out of the air and hold them to you. Trying to keep the good with you, cherishing the moments of happiness the best you could.

“The international response team is in, he’s going to be extradited, Y/N.”

The grin on JJ’s face told you it was nearly over. “He’s on his way back?”

“Yeah, he is. He’s on his way home.”

You felt yourself being pulled into her arms, though you still felt numb from everything. What you were filled in on, it didn’t explain anything, Spencer had been chasing someone down who was a suspect in the murder. But they hadn’t recovered the murder weapon, there was no ID of the suspect. Not to mention why the doctor wanted him in Mexico, why he was targeted, and overall what was going to happen. What would happen? Letting yourself fall away, the day’s events exhausted you and you let it hold on as you watched night fall, the streetlights illuminating and it surprised you how quickly they dimmed the sun rising in the sky.

“Hey.”

The voice stirred you. Your eyes burning from lack of sleep, and blinking. He looked awful, but in that moment he also looked perfect, here, back with you. Steadying yourself you propelled to him, yet his arms remained clasped in front of him.

“It’s a safety precaution.”

Pulling the FBI vest away you saw him handcuffed.

“Oh, Spencer.”

“Y/N –“

You didn’t give him a chance to talk, fumbling under his linked arms until they were locked around you, his chest nestled to your cheek.

“God, you need a shower love.”

He choked out a laugh at that. His arms embracing you the best he could.

You looked up to his haggard face, his eyes hazy and full of worry. Letting your palm caress him, you felt the scruff that had formed graze your skin.

“It’ll be okay, no matter what, Spencer Reid. It’ll be okay.”

And it would be.


End file.
